Aetherias Moon

by Aetherias Moon

Sometimes I find it hard to write because I have too much emotion caught up in me. I want to write something to share with all of you, but my words keep turning into some sort of deep confessional. I don’t know where the line is for what I want to share with the world, but maybe I shouldn’t turn this into some digital diary lol.

But I’m bubbling over with emotions and I can’t help but feel like I need to share some of what I’m going through. Maybe I’ll regret it, maybe I won’t.

Some days, I get trapped in my mind. I get stuck in cycles of fixation and obsession. I can’t sleep and all I want to do is get some rest because I know it’s what I need, but I find myself needing to put words on the page. Some days, I feel like I get trapped in my mind. Like I’m locked up and all I can do is wait it out until I feel better. All my coping skills escape me and I’m trapped in a loop of anxiety. 

I really hate those days. I had such a mix of emotions yesterday. I finished writing my romantasy novel where my queer protagonists go on an adventure through multiple dimensions. I’m calling it Project Dragon for now (which I think is a pretty fun name, and yes, there is a dragon in the novel). I’m really proud of myself. Finishing a novel is always a big deal. But I spent the rest of the day locked up, unable to do anything. 

I needed to come up with a post for today, but I struggled to do anything but try to calm my breathing. It’s the hardest when you don’t even really know what upset you because then you can’t fix it. 

I don’t know the line between being honest and sharing too much. I just want other people to see that it’s okay to have bad days, and there’s no shame in that. It’s okay that I had a mix of a good and bad day. It’s okay that I’m being vulnerable.

For the update part of this post, I wanted to let everyone know what my plans are for this website. I’m going to be posting a blog every Monday and a short story every Thursday. I have bigger plans eventually, but for now, I want to start with something and see how I manage it. This week I posted my short story on Monday, which is why you are getting this odd half confessional half update post. If you’re interested, I am a bit more personable on my Substack. I also have a chat with subscribers there where I post writing prompts. I plan on putting additional content on Substack eventually, but I’m not quite there yet. Check it out if you’re curious! Happy writing.

-Aether